The Mindful Attitudes: Beginner’s Mind

Posted on June 15, 2020September 19, 2022 by Sabrina Renee

Understanding Mindfulness

To be mindful is to be awakened to now, presence from moment to moment. As you awaken to life in the now, you’ll begin to release expectations of future moments, as well as the grip of the past. Before arriving here and now, this very moment was considered the future, and will soon become the past. By bringing your attention to the present you are tuning into the only moment that decisions are made, change is created, and life is experienced. Now is when everything is happening.

Mindfulness is best experienced rather than explained. Expanding your awareness and examining your inner world is a life-altering experience. In order for you to appreciate the magnitude of this shift in perception, this is something you must feel on your own and not just take the word of someone else. A good way to introduce yourself to practicing mindfulness is through the avenue of adopting a certain set of attitudes, allowing you to focus on the present moment. In today’s article, I’ll be focusing on the attitude of the beginner’s mind.

Click here to check out the beginner’s mind podcast episode

What is Beginner’s Mind?

A beginner’s mind is the attitude of experiencing this moment as if it is the first time, with curiosity and open-mindedness. Other ways to tap into this experience are recognizing the feeling of wonder and excitement, surrendering to the unknown in your life, and allowing yourself to be new at something.

Just as mindfulness must be practiced to be understood, the attitude of a beginner’s mind is meant to be applied to the present moment. However, the mind has a lifetime of stored memories that it will refer to when similar emotions are experienced. Therefore, you are likely to anticipate, assume, expect, or plan out moments rather than experience them for what they are.

When was the last time you surrendered and accepted that you simply don’t have the answer, in a way that’s not defeat-est but rather curious? By the end of this article, you’ll understand the beginner’s mind, how to recognize when you’re reliving a past experience, and how to tune into the now.

Take a moment to think back…

Bring to mind a time that you were feeling some sort of suffering, discomfort, anger, or negative emotion.

This isn’t the first time you’ve felt this way, and it isn’t the first time you’ve felt this way for this particular reason.

Maybe someone in your family knows exactly what to say to push your buttons.

Maybe your partner isn’t listening or communicating with you again.

Whatever it is that is bringing up these emotions within you is something that is familiar. And the familiarity invites predetermined thoughts, behaviors, and feelings into the present moment.

Because you have been through something similar before your mind is smart enough to connect the dots and bring you right to how this usually plays out for you.

This is an example of an expert’s mind, the mindset claiming to have all the answers, allowing you to move forward with a sense of knowing, having a specific plan ready, and leaving little room for something different to happen. Everyone is guilty of an expert’s mind.

A beginner’s mind, instead, is the attitude of curiosity that encourages you to remain open to what’s going on rather than expecting what will happen. Even if whatever is taking place happens to be something that has happened before or maybe happens frequently.

It’s difficult to detach yourself from the emotion or thought pattern that happens so frequently, but by doing so you are allowing space for something new.

By choosing to be curiously aware of the present moment you are opening yourself up to possibilities, opportunities, and the chance of a different outcome. The attitude of a beginner doesn’t have expectations of how things “should” be handled or experienced, because it perceives this as the first time.

A beginner is present with their experience without the feeling of attachments to particular outcomes or resistance towards others. There is a certain level of acceptance that comes along with a beginner’s attitude. You must accept the insights that come with your past experiences while also accepting that you don’t have all the answers.

Real change occurs when you are recognizing that what creates expectations, attachments, and limits within you are related to past experiences that are not happening right now.

Being in The Now

By choosing the attitude of an expert’s mind you are basing your behavior and decision-making on similar past scenarios and circumstances. When experiencing a negative emotion you’re likely to remember the sequence of events that followed. If this involved other people then you’ll remember how they acted toward you and how that made you feel.

These memories are so powerful just the thought of them can make the mind and body believe it’s happening now. If you’re recalling the same thought patterns, which are attached to negative emotions, the moment you are experiencing may feel indistinguishable from the past. Your past holds great insight into certain possible outcomes but it can also be a shackle chaining you to the same outcome.

Each time you connect back to a previous event instead of connecting fully to the present moment, you narrow the chances of alternative responses and solutions. If there is going to change, there must first be awareness of what needs changing, and that happens by tuning into that experience.

The past can’t be changed, it can only be a heavy influence on the present moment. It could also serve as a reminder that you can make a conscious choice to choose differently this time. How you use the past boils down to your intention.

The intention you bring alongside the attitude you choose is essential because it’s guiding you on your path. The intention behind an expert’s mind is often to have the solution, to “know already” and maybe even anticipate what’s to come. The intention behind the beginner’s mind however is purer, more allowing of the unknown and therefore more open to what’s possible.

Only by recognizing where your attention is focused can you become aware of your mindset. And by setting the intention of remaining open-minded and curious, you are welcoming a new set of moments to unfold. Below are a few mindful prompts to help you understand which attitude you’re operating from:

Recognize when you’re experiencing an expert’s mind

Bring to mind the present moment and how you’re feeling about it.
Notice and listen to your internal dialogue for a few moments.
Then ask yourself, “Am I anticipating the next moment or a few moments?” “Am I placing blame or judgment somewhere?” “How does my reaction make me feel?”
Become aware of the “unimportant details” or “familiar scenarios” you’ve already solved.
Ask yourself: Where’s the majority of my attention invested? Am I reliving what has already happened to me?
Once you’re aware that you are choosing an expert’s attitude about a situation, begin to list the pros and cons. How does this way of thinking serve you? How does this way of thinking limit you?

How to experience a beginner’s mind

Take 3 long inhales, followed by deep exhales inviting you into the present moment.
Become aware of the situation that has you feeling intense emotions.
Bring to mind the ways you anticipate this unfolding or how it usually does for you.
Ask yourself what part of this situation, that has not happened yet, have you already decided upon in your mind? Bring awareness to how that makes you feel and invite the possibility of something new
Now match your expectations with a dose of curiosity. Welcome the idea of something new and focus on remaining open to possibilities.
Notice resistance to the present moment and allow yourself to lean into it. Feel your feelings, sit with your emotions, and be present in your body.
Revisit the present situation and your emotional relationship to it.

Keep Coming Back

The biggest challenge of adapting one of the mindful attitudes is coming back when it gets challenging. It’s important that you remember you didn’t acquire your way of thinking by stumbling upon it, your mind-body connection has powerfully been cultivated through years of repetition. By deciding to change the way you think you must also accept the challenges that will follow, starting with keeping a focus on the present moment.

To practice mindfulness can be explained simply, but to be profoundly understood can only come by being in the present moment. Start by recognizing a situation or circumstance that you continuously have an expert’s mind, and set the intention to open up. Become curious about your thinking as well as how life is unfolding. Be aware of your body’s reaction to the mind, and how all of this is impacting your experience.

Make a choice to keep coming back to setting intentions, admitting that you are a beginner in life, and becoming a witness to the life unfolding before you. Keep coming back and watch what begins to surface.

Love. Heal. Grow.

Check out the replay of this live stream about **dropping expectations**.

MindBody

The MindBody Connection

Posted on June 8, 2020January 21, 2021 by Sabrina Renee

I taught a deeper lesson on mindbody wellness in this video!

white petaled lotus — Photo by Susanne Jutzeler on Pexels.com

Before you dive deep into this article, ask yourself “How am I feeling right now?” A common answer is “I’m fine” or “Doing alright, and yourself?” because it’s one of those questions asked without the intention of truly checking in with how we’re feeling.

Most people will ask this question to their mind, waiting for a cognitive answer to surface. This answer will be the sum of your thoughts on an experience, but not necessarily how you’re feeling. This is a true testament to just how powerful the mind truly is. Even though it’s not where feelings are experienced, this is where the question is answered.

Another way to check in with how you’re feeling is to ask yourself “what’s going on in my body right now?” Weird right? I bet you wouldn’t think to check in with how your body about how you’re feeling today.

The truth is that’s where the sensation of your feelings are being experienced. But before you understand the body, let’s venture into your mind.

Thoughts

Everything originates from a thought. Your beliefs, ideas, assumptions, and worries all begin in the mind. Therefore what you think you then become. But what if you’re not paying attention to what you think?

Well, your thoughts are creating the life unfolding before you, whether you are aware of that fact or not. Of course, the goal is not to suppress your thoughts or control them, but instead, learn to guide them in the direction that aligns best with your desire.

A good place to start practicing this is detaching yourself from thoughts, seeing yourself as the observer of the experience rather than the experience itself. By understanding the power held behind your thoughts, you’ll begin to appreciate the personal power of the mindbody connection.

Imagine your thoughts as cars speeding down a highway, while you, the observer, sits quietly on a bench watching them pass. Watching for the first time will absolutely be overwhelming. Your natural instinct is to jump in because you identify yourself with the mind and feel the urge to control these thoughts, their speed, and their intensity.

These thoughts surface within you but are separate from who you are because you are not your thoughts. You are the awareness of those thoughts. At first, it may feel extremely difficult to watch the speed and intensity that these thoughts are forming at, you may even feel compelled to attach yourself to one trying to stop it.

These thoughts have always been going at this speed, with this amount of intensity, the only difference is you are just now tuning into that experience. You have the opportunity to become the observer of your experience each time an intense emotion pops up, leaving you with two choices. Either reacting with emotion or responding with awareness.

An emotional reaction to something is a sign that you’ve been consumed by the emotion you are experiencing. That emotion decided to take the reins and decide the next best course of action.

This means if you were observing thoughts of anger you’d follow the urge to attach yourself to that thought, leading you into more anger. When you choose to respond, however, you recognize that emotion is a part of your experience, but you are not that emotion.

In other words, you are feeling anger but you are not anger. If you were observing thoughts of anger you would continue to until it dissipates or transcends to another emotion. To respond to a situation means to first become the awareness behind your experience so that you may decide what to do rather than be led by that emotion.

Practicing mindful awareness of your thought patterns and the ways you choose to handle them is a simple and challenging practice. Simple in its nature of just being with how you’re feeling rather than doing something about it.

Challenging because it’s the opposite of what you’ve trained yourself to do all these years. Each time you observe, detach and respond you are strengthening the mindbody connection by separating yourself from it.

Physical Sensations

Let’s revisit the question “how are you feeling today?” a question exchanged so often from person to person that you can answer on autopilot. The question itself asks you how you’re feeling yet people rarely take the time to check in with what they’re feeling.

Instead, they are likely to rely on what their mind tells them about how they’re feeling. Now that there is a separation from you and the mind, and you understand the difference between reaction and response, it’s time to move onto emotions in the body.

Emotions appear in the body as physical sensations, arousals, or reactions to what’s going on in the mind. These emotions show up differently and in many different forms, but the sensations are quite similar. Heart palpitations, dry mouth, tight chest, tingling sensations, and clenching just to name a few.

For instance, if you were to have a negative thought pop up you’d likely be fixated on the narrative in your mind and forgetting about the body you’re in. When you finally bring your awareness back to your body all of the sensations will overwhelmingly hit you at once. When you take the time to sit with each physical sensation as it arises you are awakening to how your body experiences your emotions.

This simple practice helps you gain clarity on your emotions, how you’re feeling, and the power of their presence. Without practicing awareness of how your mind and body are connected you may miss opportunities to get ahead of your emotion and you end up allowing them to dictate your day.

Identifying The Connection

Practicing mindful awareness with your thoughts and physical sensations takes patience and consistent practice. As you begin to identify the connection between your mind and body, you’ll also begin to identify who you truly are.

Because you are not the mind that creates the thoughts, nor are you the thoughts that you think. Just like you are not the body you have and the sensations you experience. The mind and body will always be a part of who you are, but it is not who you are.

Each time you choose to become the awareness behind your experience you create more space between what is happening and your response to what is happening.

MindBody Practice

Identifying the connection and separating yourself from the experience are both simple practices that can be very challenging. A great place to begin cultivating this practice is by identifying your dialogue separately from your bodily experience.

This is best practiced when an emotion is present but not too overwhelming, this will be the practice for the overwhelming moments. An emotion we are all familiar with is feeling anger, so let’s use anger as an example.

With most intense emotional states you will likely find yourself tangled up in the dialogue going on in your mind, so let’s begin by bringing attention into the body. Notice the sensations you are feeling in response to anger and where these sensations are showing up.

Once you’ve tuned your focus on the body use the tool of a deep inhale and a long exhale to relax into the moment. Repeat as many breath cycles as you need to before finding a sense of inner calm, even alongside your anger.

Now that you’ve brought down the intensity and separated yourself from the experience, turn your attention toward the mental chatter. If this too feels intense for you come back to the breath as your guiding tool of relaxation.

A helpful tip is to place your right hand on your belly as you witness the rise and fall of your breath. This can act as a tangible representation that there are constant fluctuations happening within you, the rise and fall of the belly, the ever-changing sensations in your body, the rapid moving thoughts in your mind.

Once you’ve invited an inner calm into the dialogue of your mind, you can begin asking yourself proactive questions. Rather than focusing on what you don’t want to feel, turn the focus toward how you would like to feel.

Start by asking these questions:

What am I thinking right now?
How am I feeling right now?
How is it appearing in my body?
Am I holding my breath or breathing deep?
How can I accept what has already happened?
What action can I take to create change?
What is the next best step for me to take?
How will this action bring me closer to how I want to feel?

Be patient with yourself as you ask questions with unpleasant answers and bring a genuine curiosity to this moment. This practice may seem simple, and possibly uncomfortable, but it is a very important step toward a happier and more aware version of self. The beauty of this practice is that it is always growing with you.

Be gentle as you begin to discover parts of yourself for the first time, show the compassion you would a friend going through a lifestyle change. Practicing mindful awareness is portable and the right time is always NOW.

Remember all change starts with becoming aware and they all begin with you.

Love Heal Grow

Healing, MindBody

Understanding Emotions

Posted on June 5, 2020 by Sabrina Renee

The MindfullyBri Podcast

Exposure

The year 2020 has been painful, eye-opening, excruciating, exhausting, and expansive. The lesson I’ve learned the loudest this month was to embrace exposure in more ways than one. For the first half of the year my priority was to reach people by creating content for my community serving their highest self. Exposing myself into the world as a mindful entrepreneur who is passionate about helping people love, heal, and grow through their experiences. I think exposure has always been a fear of mine waiting to be conquered, but I never quite knew how. When you set your mind to seeking something in life it has a miraculous way of finding you.

In April I began leading live meditations on Instagram, creating communities founded on self-development and inner work, and making resources to help people handle the issues I’ve overcome. Vulnerably sharing my journey as a means of connecting to those who are going through something too. This year had truly been about stepping into the role of a conscious leader, taking a giant leap toward my purpose on this planet. And while this type of exposure had it’s own unique challenges, overall it’s been a rewarding. Walking into the idea of exposure head on led me to leveling up my awareness of self and ability to serve my community. It’s been an incredibly personal journey, a true blessing and a dream come true that I will never take for granted.

Which leads me to the second half of the year, the time we’re entering where I’m provided a different opportunity to be exposed. This time it’s a much more intense, fearful, painful, and life altering experience. Opening my eyes and my heart to those who suffer the violent reality of oppression, racism, and injustice. I’ve exposed myself to the system that has been created to oppress, demean, and disrespect the black community. In these last fews days I’ve done something I never do and dove deep into the painful reality in my country today. Reading articles, watching videos, interacting on social platforms, and tuned into news outlets that are showing in real time people fighting for basic human rights, only to be met with even more violence and physical force.

While my heart aches over this type of exposure it fuels a different part of me than the first type does. The first type of exposure is an example of alignment, overcoming a limit I set for myself, achieving something I had set out to even though it was scary at first. It’s about me, my goals, my dreams, my purpose. That type of exposure is of personal gain. However this second type cracked me open entirely because it came from outside myself. It’s bigger than me. What I’m experiencing through a screen people are living with in this moment. The words I’m hearing on the news are someone else’s life circumstances. There is no comparison between the types of exposure, but there is a significant difference in the lessons I choose to take from them. One helps me believe I can create change when it’s necessary, and the second one reminds me just how necessary it is to change.

Healing and Serving

Empathy can only be felt toward another person. By empathizing with someone you become connected to that person through your understanding and compassion. That understanding and compassion is the bridge between a personal gain and a collective experience. But until we are able to experience that understanding and compassion within ourselves, we can’t cross that bridge and help someone else discover it. While achievement on a personal level is something to be proud of, it pales in comparison to create change on a lager scale. The second type of exposure is what cracks you wide open, it causes you to become overwhelmed and inspired. Exposing yourself to different cultures, communities, and all of the chaos surrounding you is how you REALLY help others.

Both types of exposure are important to me and so I’ve begun to merge them as one giant realization that by expanding my own knowledge I’ll inevitably be expanding the knowledge of the people who choose to tune into me. All I want to do is teach you how to tune into yourself. Teaching mindfulness is how I serve my people. It’s my duty and obligation to share resources, tools, guidance, and support. It’s my duty as a human being to advocate for the rights of others. And there’s never been a more powerful time to be the lighthouse for those traveling through treacherous waters.

Like all powerful educators, I have to consciously choose to be a student first. The best way to do that is to allow myself to feel the powerful energy that’s surrounding us all and choose to be with it rather than run. It is only through fully experiencing the life of those I’m trying to connect with that I can serve them with intentional compassion. Tuning into emotions allows me to open up to learning by surrendering the notion that I know the answer. Because there is no answer to know, right now is a time to experience emotions authentically. There is no right way to do that. The more familiar I get with the feelings of anger, sadness, hopelessness, and fear the deeper I connect to everyone else experiencing these emotions. Because we are just an extension of those experiencing those emotions. And now more than ever it’s important to make the effort to focus on the ways we are connected and not divided.

Truthfully, I want to scream and shake the shoulders of the people who are actively creating division in the world. The disgust I feel is strong enough to blind me, keeping my attention focused on the horrific events happening to innocent humans. The pain that must be coursing through the veins of the loved ones who are grieving for their babies, fathers, and sons. When I turn the controls over to my emotions there is no telling where my brain will take me. It’s not uncommon to be overrun with emotion, I’d even argue that most people are walking through life this way all the time. But it’s times like these that make it even more dangerous for our emotions to get the best of us. Especially when there are groups of people who aren’t empathetic and who are stoking the fires of the crimes and injustices of the world.

My goal isn’t to stop you from pointing fingers at who’s right and who’s wrong. My goal is to introduce another way of approaching your emotions at this time. Giving you the tools to shift your perspective long enough to create space for another way of coping if your way is hurting, not helping. To teach you to pause long enough and ask yourself if you’re handling this the best way you can. My goal is to start the conversation about the ways humans are causing their own suffering because their personal narrative has hijacked their senses. This article is to help you navigate the emotions that are distracting you, while channeling their energy into what matters most.

Emotional Connectivity

Even if you’re not outraged particularly by police brutality, racial injustice, or the horrifying media that’s been surfacing all weekend, there is still something in your life that elicits negative emotions. There are things that bring darkness out of you, have led you into darkness, or have forced you to become consumed by it all. Humans are running wildly unaware of the power resting in their emotional state. There is a large disconnect from the body and an incredible attachment to the narrative part of the mind, the part of you that creates the persona of who you are. As the division of mind and body grows, the story playing inside the mind becomes your primary focus. You focus so intently on the story of who you are that you forget you are an extension of others. The narrative in your mind plays so loud you forget it’s created by thoughts flowing untamed, and you begin to accept this as truth. With each repeating thought pattern and every decision that aligns with them, you are further separating yourself from what is happening to your body. But the stronger that narrative inside your mind becomes the louder your suffering gets, and the harder it is to see your connection to other human beings at all.

See, each time you experience an emotion it appears in your body in the form of sensation. Negative feeling emotions tend to show up as constriction, tightness, heaviness, and pain. Positive feeling emotions tend to show up as an openness, pleasure, lightweight, and allowance. Tuning into the body while you’re experiencing an intense emotion can introduce the power of the mindbody connection. The more present you become with how your body is responding to your thoughts and emotions, the deeper you can meet yourself. And as you begin uncovering these layers of emotion you can become aware of your choices, rather than being imprisoned by emotion.

You, like every other human in existence, has been driven to experience negative and intense emotional states. And although people experience these emotions for different reasons and triggers, the similar nature of emotional beings cannot be denied. I won’t ask you to understand the people who don’t understand you, I won’t even ask you to expand your awareness to others. Instead, I want to lead you within yourself because this is where all change occurs. Because even though what is hurting you is coming from outside of you, these intense emotions are all happening inside you.

My mind brings me into thoughts of revenge and retaliation, my soul cries out for understanding and love, while my body is the vessel that carries either of these truths out. That’s what I recognize in every other human being right now, emotions flooding their minds, bodies, and souls. When an emotion surfaces with enough intensity it can overcome you, blinding you of any other way of thinking or being. An emotion that is so intense it’s power is intoxicating causing you to act on those thoughts of revenge or act on your soul’s cry for love.

But if people are being taken over by their emotional reactions to the world, they are disconnecting from themselves and from each other. Please, let’s reconnect.

Love. Heal. Grow.

MindBody, Practices

Self-Care While Serving Others: Wellness Tips for Caregivers

Posted on May 25, 2020January 21, 2021 by Sabrina Renee

Do people depend on you?

Being a support system for other people is sort of like having a superpower. Your presence has energy that others can feel just by being around you. It feels safe, making it easy for them to open up and maybe even ask for help.

Those who have this quality are likely to be spectacular beings, but being there for others can have its challenges. On one hand, being the person that others depend on can bring you a sense of fulfillment, knowing that you have a positive influence on someone’s life.

On the other hand, being the person people depend on can feel like a heavy responsibility, that could ultimately cloud your focus of what matters most.

It’s easy to lose yourself in what you believe you “should be” doing for others, while your needs get pushed to the bottom of the priority list.

Before you find yourself experiencing angst, frustration, or worse, resentment, it’s important to become aware of your relationship with being there for others.

Checking-In With Yourself

Some people have very welcoming energy about them, once you’re around them you feel comfortable and safe to speak your truth. This is a wonderful gift that could easily be taken advantage of if you’re not careful.

People who are always there for their loved ones, coworkers, and sometimes the occasional stranger on a park bench, aren’t always there for themselves. It’s challenging to set a boundary that requires you NOT to be available for other people, after all it has become a part of who you are.

This doesn’t mean that being of service is a bad thing, but too much giving and not enough receiving is a recipe for an imbalanced lifestyle.

A good place to start is by checking in with your experience as well as how others are doing. The next time you are needed or being asked to do something, ask yourself:

How do I feel at this moment?
Can I handle this emotionally?
Am I doing this for the right reasons?
How will I feel after accomplishing this?
Will this hurt me or anyone else?
Is this way of helping aligned with my highest good?

Check in With Your Wellbeing

Get curious about how serving others is impacting your wellbeing. By deepening your connection with the service you provide you are more capable of creating a much-needed boundary.

Because if you are willing to do anything for anyone, you’re going to quickly burn yourself out. The more attentive you are to your own needs the better able you are to show up for those who need you most.

Tune into your energy levels, check-in on how you’re feeling, listen to any resistant thoughts popping up, all of these are signs that you need to take care of yourself.

When your energy is replenished you have more to give, no matter what pops up in your day. Start by checking in with how you’re feeling moment to moment and allow the honest answer to surface within you.

There is a difference between feeling overwhelmed and feeling disconnected from the way you serve your community. The only way to understand which one you are experiencing is by turning inward, which may not come naturally to someone who does so much for other people.

It can feel selfish to consider your own feelings because the obligation to others is so deeply rooted. The people who invest a considerable amount of time and energy into the needs of others are wired by service.

If left unchecked this can be a driving force toward resentment or anxiety about what you do and who you do it for. By tuning into your personal experience and choosing to be present you can tap into the truth of how this affects you.

Self-Care is Necessary

When caring for others more often than not the mind is wired to focus on them, considering their needs before your own comes with the territory. But when you aren’t at your best you can’t deliver your best self to them.

Your performance may suffer, your energy levels may deplete, you may be physically present while your mind is somewhere else. Something as rewarding as serving, providing, and caring for others shouldn’t have to come at the cost of your mental health.

What I would love for you to take away is that there is most likely something in your life that isn’t getting the attention it deserves.

Maybe it’s the lack of healthy food your eating or movement you giving your body. Maybe it’s the way you deal with the hardest challenge in your life or the troubling emotions that feel too impossible to handle. I’m telling you to pay attention.

Look at how you treat the unpleasantness in your life, and how it returns the favor in your lifestyle. Notice the lack of attention you give yourself, while you glorify the attention you give others.

Raise your level of self-awareness so that you can truly begin to deal with and heal from whatever is going on in your life. This is the first step to being better for yourself and for those who need you most.

Love. Heal. Grow.

Growth, Spirituality

Learning to Surrender to Something More

Posted on May 17, 2020 by Sabrina Renee

What Does it Mean to Surrender?

The two forces constantly at play in your live are resistance and allowance. Both resistance and allowance show up as energy that propels your thinking, behavior, and even your emotional state. If you are choosing a state of resistance you are refusing to accept life circumstances as they are. Your energy flows where your attention goes, and your attention is what you focus on. Therefore, by focusing on what you lack, dislike, and find unpleasant you are choosing a resistant energy to handle what’s happening. Of course suffering is a part of the human experience, negative emotions are always going to surface and that’s not necessarily a bad thing, even though it may feel that way. The point isn’t to rid yourself of low vibration emotions entirely, but instead to notice when you are fueling the fire that burns them.

By choosing a state of allowance you are opening yourself to recognize what is happening. You allow yourself to experience life as it is, without comparing or fixating on alternative ways it could or should have played out. Instead of investing your energy on what you don’t want to happen, your focus is instead on accepting it already has happened. There is nothing that can be changed except your point of view and relationship to that experience. This is what it means to surrender, to completely accept what is and release your grips on the idea that it could have been any different.

Whatever you focus on you invite more of into your experience. And although you don’t control all of what is happening outside of you, there is control over what is happening within you. As the emotions begin to surface whether pleasant or unpleasant, you can choose what you’d like to focus on. The sensations in your body, the thoughts in your mind, your overall experience, or what is happening outside of you. See, there are multiple facets of experience, each having a unique lesson to teach if you’re willing to pay attention to it. The attention is your investment of energy, that which you focus on is where your energy flows, ultimately amplifying your experience of that thing. Usually, the mind will focus on the most intense feelings occurring in the present moment, it’s up to you to tune in and shift gears.

Letting Go For What?

Surrendering your resistance to allow implies that you are giving up, and in a way you are. By choosing to resist the life in front of you, because you’re stuck on the thought that it could have been different, you are wasting time and energy. You’re giving up that way of thinking for a different way of seeing things. It’s not that you’re quitting on yourself or your plans, but you’re deciding to acknowledge that life has knocked you off course. Instead of pushing forward with your original plan, you’re opening yourself to the changes that have found you and the possibilities that follow. In order for true change to occur, you must step into the shoes of the now and not at the moment when life veered off the course that you designed for it.

To surrender means to release, let go, relinquish your hold of someone or something. Surrendering takes a certain set of attitudes to practice such as curiosity, openness, non-judgment, and detachment. By practicing curiosity and non-judgment you are bringing a mindful focus to your circumstance while dropping your opinion of what should be. Paying attention to what is happening without expectation of what will follow, or doubts about this moment. While openness and detachment help you release the belief that what is happening is personal. Choosing to see beyond the world created inside your mind and expanding to life within the universe, filled with intricate connections and divine timing that’s a part of a much larger picture.

It’s important to recognize unpleasant experiences are not happening to you, they are just happening. Because if you see yourself as helpless against life than you do not see your responsibility to how you respond to it. Instead, start seeing it as if life is happening for you to practice leveling up. Open your mind to the possibility that you are here to evolve into your greatest self and that adversity is here to help you do that. Although life cannot be undone, and there are plenty of experiences outside of your realm of control, you are the one that decides the mindset that moves you forward. So each time you find yourself experiencing unpleasantness or negative emotions, you are faced with the choice of resistance or allowance. You can choose to resist the reality of what is happening right now, ultimately perpetuating a limit that doesn’t need to exist in your life. Or you can choose to allow the reality of what is happening right now, and the difference is acceptance. You have to let go of the belief that whatever happens to you is personal, only then can you choose to allow yourself to practice acceptance.

But what are you surrendering to?

A higher intelligence. You don’t need to be religious or spiritual, you don’t have to have specific beliefs about the universe, energy, or life. All that you need to understand is you don’t have all the answers, so surrender to that fact. Release the idea that you have to have everything figured out and that life must flow according to your mind map. Lean into the belief that it is happening for you to grow, because even when it’s the worst feeling in the world this belief will move you in the right direction. There’s a difference between what is happening and your relationship to what is happening, which is where your energy gets stuck every time. Focusing primarily on the emotional pain you’re experiencing rather than prioritizing how you’re going to bounce back. If something pains you heal it, always, that’s a pivotal part of the process but it’s not the end of the road. Never allow pain to keep you resistant of what else is out there for you.

Expand your awareness beyond the thoughts and emotions that hold you in an unpleasant place. Open up to the idea that this could be used as a way of bringing you closer to a pleasant place. Create space in your mind for the possibility that there is a higher intelligence that can be tapped into and that you have a say in the direction of your life. Allow yourself to explore the opportunity of surrendering when you feel like you’re doing too much, because you most likely are, and surrender it to something that can handle the magnitude. Become mindful of your relationship with whatever or whoever you are surrendering too, and nourish it. Let go of the idea of what society says this higher intelligence is and seek that for yourself. Start believing that you are here for a reason and get curious about it. Contemplate the person you are, who you’d like to become, and what all of this means to you. Give yourself the opportunity to have an incredible life, allow it into your experience by letting go of resistance so you can receive it.

Open up and Allow Life in

Where there is another cycle of breath entering your lungs, there is another chance to choose a more expansive and evolutionary path. Choosing again starts by becoming aware of how resistance is impacting your overall wellbeing and focus. Throughout any given day you’ll be faced with the choice to resist the reality of your circumstance or to accept it’s truth. Accepting where you are in this moment, especially if it’s not where you desire to be, is not a commitment to stay stagnant. It’s simply a practice of awareness without clutching to the thought that the present moment can be any different that it is.

Open yourself up and allow life to flow in and find you where you are. Start trusting your ability to change directions when life throws you an obstacle. Instead of seeing it as something that’s meant to stop you, or that these things are happening to you, open your heart and allow yourself to see the magical opportunity to evolve higher. By choosing acceptance over resistance, you are choosing to create a magnificent life for your future self. Each time the world outside of you causes suffering, look within for the strength to allow this experience in and transcend your darkness into light. The changes you are asking for may show up disguised as pain, transformation, loss, or vulnerable exposure. Acknowledge and honor your feelings, while simultaneously using them as a compass to seek ways to adapt and overcome. There is nothing you cannot be, do, or have in this life once you get out of your own way. Take a deep breath and choose again.

Love. Heal. Grow.