Posted in Growth, Spirituality

Learning to Surrender to Something More

What Does it Mean to Surrender?

The two forces constantly at play in your live are resistance and allowance. Both resistance and allowance show up as energy that propels your thinking, behavior, and even your emotional state. If you are choosing a state of resistance you are refusing to accept life circumstances as they are. Your energy flows where your attention goes, and your attention is what you focus on. Therefore, by focusing on what you lack, dislike, and find unpleasant you are choosing a resistant energy to handle what’s happening. Of course suffering is a part of the human experience, negative emotions are always going to surface and that’s not necessarily a bad thing, even though it may feel that way. The point isn’t to rid yourself of low vibration emotions entirely, but instead to notice when you are fueling the fire that burns them.

By choosing a state of allowance you are opening yourself to recognize what is happening. You allow yourself to experience life as it is, without comparing or fixating on alternative ways it could or should have played out. Instead of investing your energy on what you don’t want to happen, your focus is instead on accepting it already has happened. There is nothing that can be changed except your point of view and relationship to that experience. This is what it means to surrender, to completely accept what is and release your grips on the idea that it could have been any different.

Whatever you focus on you invite more of into your experience. And although you don’t control all of what is happening outside of you, there is control over what is happening within you. As the emotions begin to surface whether pleasant or unpleasant, you can choose what you’d like to focus on. The sensations in your body, the thoughts in your mind, your overall experience, or what is happening outside of you. See, there are multiple facets of experience, each having a unique lesson to teach if you’re willing to pay attention to it. The attention is your investment of energy, that which you focus on is where your energy flows, ultimately amplifying your experience of that thing. Usually, the mind will focus on the most intense feelings occurring in the present moment, it’s up to you to tune in and shift gears.

Letting Go For What?

Surrendering your resistance to allow implies that you are giving up, and in a way you are. By choosing to resist the life in front of you, because you’re stuck on the thought that it could have been different, you are wasting time and energy. You’re giving up that way of thinking for a different way of seeing things. It’s not that you’re quitting on yourself or your plans, but you’re deciding to acknowledge that life has knocked you off course. Instead of pushing forward with your original plan, you’re opening yourself to the changes that have found you and the possibilities that follow. In order for true change to occur, you must step into the shoes of the now and not at the moment when life veered off the course that you designed for it.

To surrender means to release, let go, relinquish your hold of someone or something. Surrendering takes a certain set of attitudes to practice such as curiosity, openness, non-judgment, and detachment. By practicing curiosity and non-judgment you are bringing a mindful focus to your circumstance while dropping your opinion of what should be. Paying attention to what is happening without expectation of what will follow, or doubts about this moment. While openness and detachment help you release the belief that what is happening is personal. Choosing to see beyond the world created inside your mind and expanding to life within the universe, filled with intricate connections and divine timing that’s a part of a much larger picture.

It’s important to recognize unpleasant experiences are not happening to you, they are just happening. Because if you see yourself as helpless against life than you do not see your responsibility to how you respond to it. Instead, start seeing it as if life is happening for you to practice leveling up. Open your mind to the possibility that you are here to evolve into your greatest self and that adversity is here to help you do that. Although life cannot be undone, and there are plenty of experiences outside of your realm of control, you are the one that decides the mindset that moves you forward. So each time you find yourself experiencing unpleasantness or negative emotions, you are faced with the choice of resistance or allowance. You can choose to resist the reality of what is happening right now, ultimately perpetuating a limit that doesn’t need to exist in your life. Or you can choose to allow the reality of what is happening right now, and the difference is acceptance. You have to let go of the belief that whatever happens to you is personal, only then can you choose to allow yourself to practice acceptance.

But what are you surrendering to?

A higher intelligence. You don’t need to be religious or spiritual, you don’t have to have specific beliefs about the universe, energy, or life. All that you need to understand is you don’t have all the answers, so surrender to that fact. Release the idea that you have to have everything figured out and that life must flow according to your mind map. Lean into the belief that it is happening for you to grow, because even when it’s the worst feeling in the world this belief will move you in the right direction. There’s a difference between what is happening and your relationship to what is happening, which is where your energy gets stuck every time. Focusing primarily on the emotional pain you’re experiencing rather than prioritizing how you’re going to bounce back. If something pains you heal it, always, that’s a pivotal part of the process but it’s not the end of the road. Never allow pain to keep you resistant of what else is out there for you.

Expand your awareness beyond the thoughts and emotions that hold you in an unpleasant place. Open up to the idea that this could be used as a way of bringing you closer to a pleasant place. Create space in your mind for the possibility that there is a higher intelligence that can be tapped into and that you have a say in the direction of your life. Allow yourself to explore the opportunity of surrendering when you feel like you’re doing too much, because you most likely are, and surrender it to something that can handle the magnitude. Become mindful of your relationship with whatever or whoever you are surrendering too, and nourish it. Let go of the idea of what society says this higher intelligence is and seek that for yourself. Start believing that you are here for a reason and get curious about it. Contemplate the person you are, who you’d like to become, and what all of this means to you. Give yourself the opportunity to have an incredible life, allow it into your experience by letting go of resistance so you can receive it.

Open up and Allow Life in

Where there is another cycle of breath entering your lungs, there is another chance to choose a more expansive and evolutionary path. Choosing again starts by becoming aware of how resistance is impacting your overall wellbeing and focus. Throughout any given day you’ll be faced with the choice to resist the reality of your circumstance or to accept it’s truth. Accepting where you are in this moment, especially if it’s not where you desire to be, is not a commitment to stay stagnant. It’s simply a practice of awareness without clutching to the thought that the present moment can be any different that it is.

Open yourself up and allow life to flow in and find you where you are. Start trusting your ability to change directions when life throws you an obstacle. Instead of seeing it as something that’s meant to stop you, or that these things are happening to you, open your heart and allow yourself to see the magical opportunity to evolve higher. By choosing acceptance over resistance, you are choosing to create a magnificent life for your future self. Each time the world outside of you causes suffering, look within for the strength to allow this experience in and transcend your darkness into light. The changes you are asking for may show up disguised as pain, transformation, loss, or vulnerable exposure. Acknowledge and honor your feelings, while simultaneously using them as a compass to seek ways to adapt and overcome. There is nothing you cannot be, do, or have in this life once you get out of your own way. Take a deep breath and choose again.

Love. Heal. Grow.

Posted in Growth, Personal Growth, Practices

How to Float and Sting: A Champion’s Guide

Recently ESPN has been playing reruns of old sporting events, keeping their viewers nostalgic for the good ol’ days. Personally, I think that’s a genius idea, watching greatness in any form is the exact reminder people around the world need right now. My husband is a fan of boxing so he’s been tuning into the Muhammad Ali matches. Although growing up I heard his name all the time I never saw him in action until now.


So for the past couple of weeks, I’ve been able to witness him in his prime, strong, focused, confident, and a true champion. Although I’m not much of a boxing fan even I can appreciate his effort, his talent, and his overall greatness. It’s incredibly inspiring to get wrapped up in, truthfully. And that got me thinking about what it means to be a champion.


Sure maybe some people are born with an undeniable purpose to fill the shoes of greatness, but being a champion is also a set of qualities or traits one can adopt. While this historical 1st of 3 fights between Muhammad Ali and Joe Frazier played in the background all I could think was


“How does it look to be a champion outside of sports?

How does it feel to be a champion in your own life?

What’s it like to believe in yourself so devoutly that you don’t accept the possibility that anything could stop you?”


A few answers began to surface. Champions never quit because their mind doesn’t see that as an option. There are even some scenarios where an athlete’s body has suddenly quit on them and they somehow, miraculously push forward laser-focused on their mission to win. Champions are built to keep going so their mind is programmed to always find a way to the end goal, always adapting and improving.


Imagine the powerful shift this attitude would create for the pursuit of YOUR aspirations and desires, approaching the road ahead as a champion. Not ever thinking that it’s too late for anything, always giving everything you have inside, and keeping faith in the outcome even when your chances are slim.


How miraculous would your life be if you became the champion of it?


A Champion Lifestyle

All of the greats in sports like boxing, basketball, and football are known for their obsessive training. They view each day as the perfect opportunity to improve their skill set. They are excellent at prioritizing their time to hone in on their craft, reflecting on how they’ve improved, and setting high standards and even more scrupulous goals along the way.


A champion’s attention to detail is fine-tuned because it’s a mental muscle they use often, it’s their job to anticipate and prepare themselves for all scenarios without losing sight of the winning outcome.


Once becoming a recognized champion, each person receives an entire team of people to help them achieve their goals. A fitness trainer provides a wellness strategy, a specialized coach to build up their weaknesses, and a person scheduling their practices and real-life matches or games. Although champions naturally keep themselves accountable with their internal drive for more they still have someone nudging them along with wisdom and guidance.


All of these structures hold in place the intricacy of their routines, finding balance and coordination in their training and their life. But there once was a time when this individual had to show up and do that work on their own.


Champions are made, not born. Even if someone has breathtaking talent from the moment they arrive earth-side, mere talent alone doesn’t win championships. There are a myriad of habits that must be cultivated, discipline that must be learned, a passion that must be fueled, and, of course, the time to develop the talent to championship level. If every champion waited for the coach to show up and the trainer to push them, the world would have a shortage of clips recalling greatness.


Champions worked for it even when no one else could see the end goal. They fueled their faith muscles and shrunk their doubts, moving forward with the best plans they could create until they learned to improve. Champions worked hard when no one was watching so they could prevail for all to see.



So, what makes a champion?


Environment (what/who you surround yourself with, by)

The people and places you are surrounded by are going to have an incredible impact on the person you become. Circumstances shape a person, and even if you can’t cut certain people out of your life or move your location right now, you always have choices. Champions choose to practice over party, to work hard over being lazy, to get back up after the entire world knocks them down.


Vision (focus)

Having the ability to create a specific outcome in your mind’s eye is a significant part of training in a champion’s life. They have their eye on the prize even when the odds are stacked up against them and this comes with practice. Focus, in an instant gratification world, is a tall order but it’s just as possible for you as it is for a boxing champion. It’s all about what you continue putting your attention on.

Champions know the importance of cutting out distractions and being aware of when they’ve become distracted. Each time their mind wanders is another opportunity to train in focus, bringing themselves back to the vision they’ve painted of success, winning, and overcoming.


Persistence(never giving up)

Champions have any talents and traits that lead the way to their greatness, persistence may be the strongest one. To have a quality that doesn’t allow you to quit on yourself or your dreams means you will get there. It may look different from how you picture it, it may be harder than you planned, but as long as you never stop going after it there’s always a chance.

Persistence is so strong because it’s a combination of knowing who you are and what you’re capable of, mixed with your mindset and mind’s eye goals. If you can think it you can become it, champions know this at their core and will persist until the end of time.


Structure (prioritize your time and energy)

Having a solid structure throughout a champion’s life is the glue that holds the entire operation together. It may not be one of the more sexy traits but it’s absolutely essential to have a schedule. In an athlete’s season, and yours too, there are times for rest and time for work, times to refuel your energy and time’s to explode with it.

The conditions of your life will continue fluctuating, your structure while strong will also need to be flexible for the changes you find yourself facing. Extra time cannot be found so it’s important to use each moment appropriately and to plan ahead for things that may unfold. Energy is generated within you, so it can always be replenished but only when you’re away from depletion.

The structure is more than just setting goals and making them happen, it’s about tuning into what’s best for you right now and adjusting accordingly.


Attention to detail (caring about the big and small stuff alike)

Although some aspects of life may be seen as more significant than others, nothing is seen as unimportant in a champion’s lifestyle. From the way they eat and the clothes, they train in, to the music they listen to and the times they complete their routines. Each of these things serves a purpose and is chosen particularly with conscious attention and effort.

Champions leave nothing for chance, whether their decision comes from within or they seek outside counsel for insight because they know the importance of being decisive and attentive. Making their way to their desired outcome won’t happen if anything is left to probability or coincidence, they understand the importance of input and don’t hesitate to apply it.


Balance (enjoy and execute)

When Muhammad Ali said, “float like a butterfly sting like a bee” he simplified the beauty of balance, gentleness, and confidence, be light yet strong, smart yet forceful, knowing when to align and when to take action.

This way of living, fighting, playing, and being is cultivated over time and consistent practice. Learning when to push and when to pull, applying all of the traits and habits that make a champion, witnessing how they unfold, knowing when to go along for the ride and when to take the wheel.

Experiencing balance originates in the mind, being able to find a confident and calm stillness within you is the first step to allowing balance to surround you. You’ll know it when you feel it, and even more so when you don’t.


Be The Greatest

Whatever your calling in life or purpose on this planet, choose to be the greatest at it. Being the greatest in this case doesn’t mean comparing your success to the levels of anyone else, in fact, you are your only competition. The person you were at the beginning of this venture is who you’re competing with, proving it to, making you proud, and using as an example that anything is possible for you.


Showing up as your best self is going to look different for every person, in every changing season of life. Muhammad Ali as a 20-year-old is an incredible athletic machine, while years down the line his greatness took a different form. He grew mentally and physically, so it was important that his craft adapted to those changes. Whatever youth took from him physically he replaced with the wisdom and experience of being in the ring all these years.


Each of us has an innate wisdom that will help carry into our desired outcomes, along with a set of champion-lie traits. This means you have the capability to become the champion of your life today just by applying a champion mindset to your life. Become aware of your environment and how it’s shaping you, continue fueling your vision by practicing holding your focus on what matters most, and never ever quit on what you believe in because it’s always possible to achieve. I


t’s important to have a structure that holds all of this together, making sure you’re managing your time and energy efficiently, giving complete attention to detail, and never overlooking one bit of where your time goes. Finding balance will come in time, the more you practice tuning into your experiences, feelings, and results, the deeper you’ll get to know internal struggles. When peace is found within nothing outside can rock you.


Imagine how powerful the shift in your life would be if you decided to tackle all roads with the mindset and determination of a champion. All that’s left is to decide which part of your life have you not been showing up as the champion of.


Start taking stock of which traits have you been allowed to slip through the cracks over the years, or maybe always struggled with. Begin to visualize what being a champion looks like in your personal and professional life, think about who would benefit and the ripple effect of goodness shared. The best place to start is by dreaming big without limits, begin visualizing what greatness feels like to you, and never stop seeking clarity on it.


Remember all champions have to start somewhere, so start here, today.


Thanks for checking out this post! I think you may also like this podcast episode: 

5 Questions to Get to Know Yourself

Posted in Growth

How to B.L.O.O.M in Dark Times

concrete tunnel

The Void

It’s been said that destruction is often the first step in recreation. The caterpillar must die for the butterfly to come to form. Sometimes when it feels like your life is falling apart, it’s actually beginning to come together in a new and improved way.

While in the thick of the storm it’s hard to see that it will pass because you’re focused on lack, damage, and change. The normalcy as you know it has ended, leaving you in what is known as the void-a space between what was and what will be.

During your time in the void, you’ll be learning about your true nature, being stripped from life as you know it can do that to you. You’ll be forced to shift your perspective into the next steps to take or stay stagnant, waiting for the storm to pass.

The truth is all storms pass, everything changes, nothing is permanent. But what is also true is there is a version of you who enters the void and a version of you who leaves it, you’ll be changed forever.

How you shape that perspective and build that character depends on the choices you make in the void.

close up photography of pink tulip flower

Are you buried or planted?

Bring to mind the seeds that are placed in the ground to harvest. Think of the trying times and tests they are put through before becoming a plant, a tree, medicine, or food on your plate.

Dug into a deep dark hole with little if any light, left only with an innate sense that something is going to happen next. Life can feel just like this at times. Things are dark and uncertain, you know something’s going to happen but aren’t sure what will.

All that you’ve got is your will to push through and the mindset to fuel it, but these things are choices, not obligations. The perspective you choose will determine the difference between whether you have been buried and planted in the ground. And your choice will begin propelling you toward that outcome.

Being buried feels like a complete lack of control over your life. Feeling the weight of the world on top of you, keeping the light from coming in. An experience similar to suffocation as you’re being pushed down deep into a swirl of emotions that continue reminding you of all the things you can’t change.

At first, it may seem that these things are happening to you, but after a while, you begin to expect it and maybe even seek the presence of unease. Simply put, the void means you’re not living the life you’ve been used to but you’re also not yet living your next chapter because it’s still being built.

It can feel like standing still in a field with no paths leading home until you choose to make one. If you choose to believe you’re being buried this feeling will last a very long time and you’ll continue to miss out on what’s waiting for you.

Being planted will have similar emotions attached but with a difference in feeling. While emotions arise naturally within feelings are focused on and determined by will. The experience may still be unpleasant but you’ll learn to focus on what is waiting for you on the other side of this trying time.

There may still be weight over you of all that you’ve lost but you’ll begin to acknowledge what is no longer holding you back. You’ll still be in darkness for quite some time but you strongly believe that if you push on a little longer, that light will shine through.

The time spent living in the void is a time to accept what is as a start to a brand new beginning. If you can shift your perspective from darkness to light, while still in the darkness, you’ve begun laying the foundation of the next chapter. When you choose the perspective of being planted there is no place to go but up, and you’re well on your way.

woman wearing grey long sleeved top photography

Relax, Release, Allow

Acceptance is a large step toward whatever lifestyle or goal you are trying to reach. You need a starting point and that’s what acceptance gives to you. Acceptance isn’t giving in or quitting.

It’s not telling yourself this is your way of living forever and it’s definitely not a pass to let time go by without putting effort into change. It is only once you’ve fully accepted where you are at this time in your life can you begin to see clearly where it is you’re going.

The three steps to come back to that help pave the way for life after acceptance are:

relax, release, and allow.

Relaxing into this moment means mentally and physically too since the body often holds onto tension, sometimes hours after your thoughts and emotions have passed. Bring more attention to the body’s sensations while you’re experiencing unpleasant emotions or thought patterns.

It takes time, practice, and consistency so be patient with yourself as you meet the parts of you that are troubling to navigate. Keep practicing. Keep coming back with a single breath cycle, an inhale and an exhale, to ground you back into your body and the present moment.

Once you’ve begun to relax your mind and body you can start moving into releasing what you are trying to hold onto. This should start at an internal level such as limiting beliefs, physical tension, and negative thoughts that are causing burdensome experiences.

Again, be patient with yourself and don’t quit because it’s hard to focus long enough. It won’t be easy but the simple way to approach it is to come back to the breath, the present moment, accepting what is even if it’s uncomfortable.

Whether you are aware of what’s happening within you or are keeping your eyes shut to the fact, it’s happening. Think of this practice as an awakening to your true self, drops of awareness in a giant bucket of consciousness.

When you’ve relaxed into the moment, begun to release what’s been holding you back, you can finally shift into allowing.

If you choose to believe you have been planted then you must believe that there is more transformation for you to go through. Being planted into the ground is the first step of many that lead to extraordinary growth that comes in stages.

fashion woman notebook pen

In order for you to expand and prosper you must first allow for these experiences to happen. Relaxing and releasing what has happened or what is currently unfolding is different from practicing allowance, which can refer to either this moment or what is on the way.

A good way to remind you to practice allowance is by bringing your attention to when you are choosing resistance. Notice if you’re resisting anything at this moment, in your life, or in the grand scheme of things.

There are plenty of circumstances out of your control that you do not have to enjoy or even agree with, but resistance is a choice. When you choose resistance you’re investing energy in not letting go to a perceived idea or way of living, instead of proactively considering your next move.

Practice shifting your energy to what you can do.

Expansion often arrives disguised as discomfort, suffering, the paralyzing fear of not knowing what comes which helps deepen your roots while forcing you to reach higher. The higher you reach the closer you meet the goodness and light that trying to meet you.

Allow Yourself to B.L.O.O.M

This simple acronym is an effective way to remember how to navigate through the void of your life. Each time you visit it’ll surface different answers to these prompts, but it will always shift your perspective toward growth.

It’s important to remember that which does not challenge you will not change you, start looking for the ways you can improve right now no matter how small the step. Become aware of what is happening in the void without attaching your personal story to it.

Begin stripping away the judgments you attach to the struggle you are up against and start thinking of practical ways to maneuver through. The time you spend in the unknown months of your life can be a powerful shift in mindset, skill set, and momentum if you allow it to be.

These 5 prompts are a great place to start.



Practice shifting your attention toward all of the wonderful things you have at this moment. Bring your focus to the feeling of your blessings, it’s less about the story surrounding it so don’t get caught up in details.

Each time you practice you’re expanding your imagination which is a muscle that weakens each time you choose doubt and disbelief. This will make it easier to visualize and believe in the blessings that are on their way to you.


Learn how to focus on the growth-focused takeaways from each day you live through. Make a shift from the perspective of the sufferer to the student seeking out all the lessons you could learn from what you’re going through.

It could be as simple as learning to never make that mistake again or learning to incorporate more patience into your day. As with all of these exercises you’ll get better with consistent practice.


Acknowledge the obstacles in your path with an attitude of conquering them, crumbling before them. Recognize the journey will not be one of ease all the time and there will be things that trip you up.

Shift your focus to how you’ll overcome them, what skills you need to acquire, how much time you’ll need to invest, and how wonderful the reward will be on the other side. Obstacles are not optional, they’re necessary for growth, but what is optional is the way you choose to approach them,


Actively begin seeking ways to improve mentally, emotionally, and personally to create a better lifestyle. There are plenty of opportunities for you to grow through what you go through if you’re looking for them, which means you have to practice focus.

Start with your thought patterns, limiting beliefs of what’s possible for you, intense emotional reactions, and the environment you’re in. Open up a running tab of ways to be a little better than you were yesterday. Start slow, be realistic with the season you’re in, but never suit looking for expansion.


Start to strategically combine all that you’ve learned and practiced with the above concepts and create an action plan. Be honest with how lofty your dreams are and don’t make that a bad thing, just start with what you’ve got and move forward.

Momentum is going to be the driving force that pushes you out of your comfort zone and into the successful lifestyle you imagine for yourself. You also need to be honest about the season of life you’re in, the burdens you’re carrying, and what you’re capable of sustaining once you start.

Some people can take quantum leaps, while others have to take baby steps, don’t judge yourself on where you’re starting momentum has a way of picking up quick.

Let’s Review

At some point in your life, you will find yourself in the void, the space between who you were and who you’re becoming. It can be a time of confusion, fear, scarcity, and uncertainty. It can also be a time of hope, empowerment, faith, and growth.

The beauty of the void is your perspective determines what you get out of it. The situation itself isn’t something you have control over but the response to it is in your hands. Before you respond to something that’s happening around you it’s important to practice introspection to find out how you feel about it, what you want out of it, and how you’re gonna make it happen.

Don’t be afraid to sit with yourself during uncomfortable times. In fact, this should be the first thing you do. Get to know what’s going on inside of you, learn about your fears, ask about your desires and the person you want to become. Don’t stay stagnant in the void because in time it will become a memory of the past. So how do you want to remember this time?

As Jon Kabat-Zinn so perfectly titled his book “Wherever You Go, There You Are.,” so stop running from yourself. Relax into the present moment because it’s the only one that actually exists, the rest are either memories, ruminations, assumptions, or expectations of the past and future.


Be here now.

Release your grip on what has past, what is no longer serving your highest good, what cannot be changed and notice how all of those thoughts impact your body. Start letting go of tension in your body, release your clenched jaw and fists, uncurl your toes, sit up straight and just present.

Stop resisting what you don’t like about this moment, stop pushing away your reality in hopes of feeling better, stop denying things as they are and awaken to the power you have right now. Stop trying to change your life by resisting what is and start focusing your energy on what you can do about it.

Allow yourself to expand into new possibilities, creating space for new chances and fresh starts to find you. Allow yourself to bloom.

Start by counting your blessings every day and finding the lessons you could be learning every night. Start acknowledging the obstacles in your path as chances to enhance your mindset, skill set, and awareness of the journey ahead.

Start seeking opportunities in ordinary moments to improve your emotional and mental wellbeing, while growing into the person of your soul’s highest desire. Begin building the momentum you need to push you upward, into the light and out of the darkness.

All of this is possible if you’re open to change, if you believe that you are enough as you are, and if you start now.

Love Heal Grow

Posted in Growth, Practices, Spirituality

Be Mindful of Your Focus: Conversations With The Universe

Identifying Your Focus

The dance between desire and resistance is constantly pulsating throughout your life. It lives in every thought that arises, every emotion that surfaces, every decision being made, as well as the consequences that follow. Each day you are sifting through what you want and don’t want. As you identify your goals, dreams, desires, planning out the next steps, and learning all that you have to overcome, you are co-creating your life with the universe. Figuring out what you desire takes energy, just as figuring out what you do not desire takes energy. If you want to attract a better, more improved lifestyle, it’s essential to understand what you are constantly focusing on.

Co-creation has a great deal to do with focus and decisiveness. Whatever you focus on is what will begin appearing in your life. Once you’ve decided on what action needs to take place, the momentum will begin to shift the sails of progress in your favor. When you know what you want, and believe that there is a force out there helping you reach it, life will propel you toward the next steps. Co-creation is happening whether you or not you are aware of what your attention is on. Therefore, if you’re focused on fearing the worst and catastrophizing all of the ways your life can unfold, you are aiding in that particular co-creation in your life.

A common mistake in co-creation is focusing the majority of your attention on that which you no longer want. You may think you’re simply separating that which you desire from what you do not, but that’s not what your energy is saying. Each time you talk or think about what you wish would change in your life, what you’re lacking in your life, how unfair circumstances are for you, what you don’t like anymore, and all the ways you are suffering, you are focusing your energy on resistance. Resisting what you WANT by focusing on what you DON’T WANT. See, the universe doesn’t respond to the words you’re speaking. It doesn’t hear “don’t” “can’t” “no”. The universe speaks in energetic frequency or the feeling you experience when thinking those thoughts and speaking those words.

When your attention is focused on what you don’t want you to feel contracted, closed, limited, frustrated, and far from that which you’re searching for. The more you experience this feeling, the more you share the energy of resistance to what it is you truly want. because that is the frequency you are strongly emitting. Therefore you have to become attuned to the energy and feelings that your thoughts are generating so that you are aware of what it is you are calling into your life. It’s very important to distinguish what you want from what you don’t but what comes after is monumental.

Tapping Into Your Desires

Visualizing the best version of yourself is a powerful form of communicating exactly what you want. It’s a practice of building up the muscle of your mind to create goodness in your life. It’s easier to play out the negatives in your life because you spot them easier. The brain was designed to keep you safe, out of harm’s way, so you’re likely to notice the wrongs over the rights in your life. All this means is that you’re practicing focusing on one more than the other. So it’s important to implement a visualization practice into your daily routine. Start building your imagination muscle to create the wonderful abundant things in life you label as “impossible”, “some-days”, or “dreaming big”.

Start by asking yourself questions that dare you to dream big. There are no limits to your imagination unless you put them there, so when you begin to notice them start dismantling them. It may be hard at first if you’re someone struggling with self-doubt, disbelief, and fear of that which you have yet to see. That just means you have to practice shifting your thoughts into the limitless possibilities more often. Remember that all things that exist today began in the mind of someone, just imagine what’s waiting in yours.

In your mind’s eye play out what it would look like to be successful, how it would look to feel peaceful, how it would look to be happy with yourself and in your relationships, how it would look to have a job you love providing a service you believe in. If you’re not sure of what exactly you want out of the next phase of your life start by focusing on what brings you joy now. Think of the activities where you’re smiling not worried about the time, experiencing flow, feeling fulfilled and exploding with love. Bring to mind the people who make you feel good, the places that ground you, the events that are forever etched in your memory bank as magic. The longer you hold your focus on a thought, the stronger you emit that frequency, the more clear the universe gets your request.

Aligning with that which you desire is simple to do, but requires constant awareness of your energetic focus. Once you’ve become aware of the many ways you are feeding into low vibrations, distracting thoughts, and negative feelings, you can start bringing yourself into that which you do want. Start looking for things that make you feel good and appreciating those moments while they are happening. Practice visualizing the life you want to live when you notice you’re focused on all that you want to change. Begin strengthening your focus on better feeling thoughts and you’ll start attracting improved circumstances.

Walking Forward in Faith

It’s called co-creation because you’re not alone in making things happen, although there is still work to be done on your part. Identifying your desire, practicing gratitude for your current blessings, focusing your attention on what is on it’s way to you, and taking the practical steps to make this shift into abundance-these are all your responsibilities. Spirit is all-knowing, therefore it has a different role in the co-creation of your life. Spirit’s role is to guide you on the path. Not reveal the next 2 miles ahead, you’ll only get a few hundred feet. Not to give you the answers outright, but will give the guidance on the next step IF you ask. Not to provide all the solutions for you, but to lead you to the resources to help build your levels of knowledge, resiliency, and awareness on this journey. If you’re lost on the path you can, and always should ask for guidance. Release the idea that you know how life should unfold for you, or the specific steps you think need to happen. Let go of the idea that you are in control of the how because you’re not. Set up the best plan you possibly can, take action on it every day, keep moving forward in all the ways you possibly can, and then let go of the outcome.

Releasing the reins on the how is one of the hardest things for humans to be. The ego drives you into thinking that your perspective, your plan, your idea, your way is the right way. This kind of thinking can cloud your judgment, sometimes taking you away from what’s best for you. Spirit is all-knowing and always knows what’s best for you. Walking forward in faith is about trusting that the higher power you are co-creating is orchestrating life to work in your favor. The connection you share with Spirit is one of unconditional love. Just as a parent wants nothing but the best for their child and will do anything to make that happen, Spirit wants that very same for you. When your desires are clearly communicated, your energy is aligned with your purpose, and you are taking action on your goals, Spirit begins paving the unknown for your arrival.

On top of all of your concrete actions that need to be taken, there is yet another powerful decision to make that can’t be seen or measured. It can only be felt, believed, understood, and experienced. That is having faith in that which you cannot see but already believe. A prerequisite of acquiring the life you want is believing it will show up, even before there is any evidence proving you right. Keeping a strong sense of faith during times of uncertainty, suffering, loss, change, illness, and fear is going to be difficult. With each challenge you find yourself facing you will have a choice: strengthen your faith or strengthen your doubt.

Doubt comes from the inability to believe that something is possible, mainly because we are focusing on the specific tools, knowledge, and circumstances currently available. Doubt creeps in and plans it’s hostile take over when there isn’t enough “proof” that everything is going to work out. Doubt is strong, and the mind has had plenty of practice in building its case with it. Faith, on the other hand, comes from the ability to believe in something that is felt but not seen. Faith is the medium of communication between who you are now and who you are becoming. Faith is harder to keep around than doubt because it’s asking you to keep going when it feels impossible, to keep your head up when you’re exhausted, to keep moving when you “think” you have nothing left. But faith will bring you to the other side of fear, where all of your desires are waiting, while doubt will keep you complacent and safe from change.

Piecing It All Together

There will always be the labeling of the wanted and unwanted, desire and aversion, attraction and resistance. This is how people sift through categories of life, creating mental vision boards of what you believe is best for you, and what is not. Now you understand the energy that goes into this process and just how powerful that energy is. The energy you release with the thoughts you experience and the words you share are creating a conversation with the universe. You are communicating the details of the life you want to create, whether you are aware of it or not. And now that you’re aware of it here are 10 practices you can start today.

  1. Be mindful of where your focus is throughout the majority of the day

  2. Spend less time focusing on what you DON’T want

  3. Practice shifting your attention toward the blessings you already have

  4. Begin thinking of how good it feels to have what you are attracting into your life

  5. Build a plan and keep working toward attaining these goals, successes, accomplishments

  6. Surrender the outcome to a higher power, release the how

  7. Actively choose faith over doubt once you become aware of the choice

  8. Practice building your imagination muscle and visualizing your future

  9. Stop limiting what is possible for you

  10. Be gentle with yourself in the challenging times, you’re doing the best you can.

Spirit has been waiting for you to finally commit to co-creating your life with a conscious effort. Each time you practice you release what no longer serves you and gain clarity on what is best for you. Lean into the process by having fun with your imagination and conversations with the universe. Asking for help can be as simple as “I don’t know what I’m doing, please help guide me”. Just be sure to practice patience for the answer to the surface within you. Keep an eye out for your surroundings and anything that could be seen as a sign, you’ll just feel it. The more you practice communicating with a higher power the more comfortable and clear your relationship will become.

Love, heal, grow.

Posted in Growth

Being Purpose Driven in 2020

What is Your Purpose?

Such a loaded question for some and so simple for others. For all of us, finding your purpose equals finding meaning in your life and the moments you invest in. When you’ve identified your purpose life choices get narrow, the trajectory of your life becomes a bit more clear. Life’s purpose is not what you do but rather who you innately are.

My purpose is to be a healer, to heal myself so that I may teach others the tools to heal themselves. Although it took years and years to redefine it in such simple terms, it remained true through all occupations. As someone working the stock room in retail, as a server at Applebee’s, as a child care attendant and as a personal trainer, this was who I have always been at the core. So whether you know exactly what your purpose is or you have absolutely no clue, or even if you’re somewhere in between the two here is my advice to you: don’t allow your current life circumstance to define your purpose for you.

Creating a Purpose Driven Life

Creating a purpose-driven life means understanding the values that align with it. Once those values are identified they become the focal points of your thinking and decision making. Deciding to live a life on purpose sounds simple enough but it comes with the price of self-discipline. These values may reveal themselves or match easily with the life you visualize, but the hard work comes when those values clash with any current belief system. The biggest challenge for me was identifying that one of my values was respecting my self-worth which often meant putting my needs before others. Until an opportunity to help a friend, family member, or even someone I was dating went against that value. The belief system I had for so long made me feel that putting myself first was a form of betrayal of those I love. Therein lies the choice: change or familiarity?

Now, of course, each circumstance and person is different. There are no right answers across the board for any core values defined. But it will more often than not invite an inner conflict into your life. One that forces you to choose between who you’ve always been and who you wish to be. It’s about strengthening your intuition and trusting what feels like the best way to go. When this happens don’t judge yourself by labeling one answer right or wrong. Just remember only ONE choice can bring you closer to living a life on purpose. Choose wisely.

Not a Destination, A Way of Living

The more you challenge your belief system the more self-aware you become. Self-awareness is a tool that allows you to confront thoughts before they become actions. If practicing self-awareness becomes a habit than so does the opportunity to create change. Because change doesn’t happen once you declare you’re ready for it. Change doesn’t occur because you’ve clearly defined your core values or proclaimed a particular way of living. Life begins to change when you interrupt the pattern of behavior or thinking to shift the trajectory of your path. When you decide to trust your gut over the nostalgic and all too familiar choice that is insisting to be chosen. Change shows up in life when you constantly and consistently show up with the tool of self-awareness.

Here are 5 ways to show up on purpose:

  1. Set intentions before taking actions

  2. Check-in with your thoughts and experiences throughout the day

  3. Question the beliefs that challenge your defined values

  4. Say no to what does not align with your purpose

  5. Be kind to yourself as you grow through each experience

Remaining True to Yourself

Staying the course will be filled with hard choices and lessons learned, so move forward with compassion. Taking responsibility for where you are in life is just as important as forgiving yourself for mistakes made. There will be parts of yourself that will be surfacing for the first time, invite them with kindness. Use that as a chance to study them with nonjudgmental awareness and make a purpose-driven decision. Appreciate the journey each day rather than focusing on the destination because the more you grow the further it becomes.

Being on purpose is a daily choice that invites more love, joy, fulfillment, and gratitude. Pay attention to what each day has to offer. Practice living a purpose-driven life through the 5 tips and grow through what you go through with awareness.